In the Wilderness Lent 1; Matthew 4:1-11 Jesus fasted in the wilderness at the beginning of his ministry. Baptized, commissioned, he was led up by the Spirit to be tempted by the devil – holy and diabolical collaboration? He rejected programs for happiness based on instinctual needs for security, esteem, power – so writes Thomas Keating, a wise one of the faith. I look back at my ministry from retirement, that genteel wilderness. Where has the Spirit led me into tempting and testing in harsh and lonely lands? Security as a program for happiness? My placements were often taxing, but paid part-time. Survival seemed to demand extra work – a fast from needed rest. Exhaustion served security, rebuilding a home for retirement. Was that a temptation, or delayed self-care? As for esteem, yes, I know, for me that promises happiness, false if it becomes a craving, but affirmation is a connection, a gift gratefully received, and sometimes public esteem enabled pursuit of vocation. Jesus had his disciples who affirmed his identity, the voice of God that spoke of love and listening. Did I desire power? I lamented its lack, my failure to make a difference. I valued cooperation, not dominance or manipulation, but had no vision for effective change, only for reflection and imagination. I claimed time for the gifts of poetry and performance, and so exercised my power, gained supportive esteem, made bread for survival. Yes, it was for the kingdom, but also for me, for whatever growth I could wring from thin, dry earth. How to defeat temptation? Jesus answered with Scripture verses, spoken with appropriate authority. The devil quoted Scripture, but politely accepted that defence. I write both questions and insights, exploring the meaning, naming the wilderness and temptations. Do honest, painful words keep the tempting shadow at bay, or perhaps attempt detente? After dialogue with the devil, if I maintain some integrity, will the wilderness flare with Spirit flame as angels stoop? Barbara Messner 22/02/2023 Image address: https://barbpoetpriest.blog/wp-content/uploads/2022/03/pexels-photo-259526.jpeg?w=1024
The Mountain (lyrics)
The Mountain (lyrics) sung to Aberystwyth by Joseph Parry or Hollingside by John Bacchus Dykes (tunes for Jesus, lover of my soul) Transfiguration; Matthew 17: 1-9 Climb this mountain path with me, lest I slip or lose my way. Show me vistas we can see when we’ve scaled the heights and pray. As I watch, my mind grows still, so I see by inner sight – not my dreams or restless will – but you, bathed in radiant light. Timeless wisdom greets the wise, those who spoke out for the One; cloud of glory sails the skies, voice of God tells love of Son. How to keep this vision clear? I would grasp it, hold it fast. Revelation has come near; closed in stone, will knowing last? Overwhelmed am I with fear, falling to the bruising ground. Seems I may not linger here with that light of love around. I must face a dark descent, silent, dazed, inside my head. Glory briefly came and went - showed him risen from the dead? Barbara Messner 16/02/2023 Image address: https://barbpoetpriest.blog/wp-content/uploads/2023/02/pexels-photo-1785502.jpeg?w=683
Passive Resistance
Passive Resistance
Epiphany 7; Matthew 5:38-48
On mount or plain he teaches wisdom’s word:
“When someone strikes you, turn the other cheek!”
So counter-cultural, it seems absurd:
how can he dare to claim: “Blessed are the meek?”
You can’t defend your land if hands are slack.
The law says: “Tooth for tooth and eye for eye!”
Why then give up the right to hurt them back?
Survival instinct urges: “Fight or fly!”
while he goes silent, undefended to his death.
There’s courage there, but can he claim to win?
The enemies he loves deny him breath;
no heavenly hosts descend to conquer sin:
and yet, there’s Gandhi, Martin Luther King:
their deaths life-giving, like the thorn-crowned King.
Barbara Messner February 2017
Image address: https://barbpoetpriest.blog/wp-content/uploads/2023/02/pexels-photo-164636.jpeg?w=1024
Walking in the Ways of God (lyrics)
Walking in the Ways of God (Lyrics of a Song) Epiphany 6; Matthew 5: 21-48 1.When you’re angry, find some space; (walking in the ways of God) breathe and seek a healing place. (talking in the ways of God) Don’t insult or call them names! Leave their tit-for-tatting games! (walking in the ways of God; talking in the ways of God.) 2. If they claim your word offends, (walking in the ways of God) be the one to make amends. (talking in the ways of God) Anger at the wrongs you see can inspire a fervent plea. (walking in the ways of God; talking in the ways of God.) 3. When relationships grow sour, (walking in the ways of God) try to change abuse of power. (talking in the ways of God.) Women, children, in harm’s way - turn the cheek does not mean stay. (walking in the ways of God; talking in the ways of God.) 4. Help the ones who spoil your day; (walking in the ways of God) love your enemies and pray. (talking in the ways of God) God gives love, like rain and sun, judgement free for everyone. (walking in the ways of God; talking in the ways of God.) Barbara Messner 3/02/2023 Image address: https://barbpoetpriest.blog/wp-content/uploads/2023/02/pexels-photo-9614062.jpeg?w=1024
Salt of the Earth, Light of the World
Salt of the earth, light of the world Epiphany 5; Matthew 5:13-20 If we, like salt, bring savour, and conserve the earth, can we retain that quality? Will words that sparkle on the tongue preserve creation’s rights, and battle entropy? If we are light that’s set upon a hill, can we remain connected to a power that through all blackouts keeps light burning still, a glow of promise in the darkest hour? If God’s commandments are our salt and light to share with others in our dubious world, how might we read that compass in the night, and in the tempest, hold that map unfurled, until like prisms, hearts share rainbow light, while fields of salt beneath the sun flare white. Barbara Messner February 2020
Blessed are Those, but What about Me?
Blessed are those, but what about me? Epiphany 4; Matthew 5:1-12 Ah! the Beatitudes! Why do I read them with unease? Do I flinch from the suffering, dare not claim the virtues? Can I see them as be-attitudes, sometimes experienced, often not, seldom attained by will and effort, their blessings paradoxical? Consider my poverty of spirit. It’s not a chosen humility, but an unstable mix of insecure self-blame and acceptance of my gifts and confidence. Chaotic emotions have always been close to my surface, soon exposed when problems multiply. Then I teeter on the edge of darkness with tears slippery underfoot. Perhaps it is the kingdom of heaven that baptizes me with weeping and sets me upright again. Of course I mourn, who does not? Life brings losses, deaths and failure. I seek the illusion of comfort in distraction, though I know only sitting with grief and sharing it bring the blessing of real comfort. Meekness is not a state I trust. I have been mild too often when I wanted to stand up and speak out. Then perhaps I might have been blessed with hunger and thirst for righteousness which earn the right to be filled. Mercy I desire but don’t often dispense: annual donations, some time as a chaplain, this ongoing domestic caring, minor but sometimes onerous. Perhaps there are patches of pure heartedness, or at least a grateful awareness where I do see God in a bird and a tree, a word and worship. I want to be a peacemaker, but more often I’m an accommodator who longs to avoid conflict. God still loves that child in me. As for being reviled and persecuted, given the world’s history of cruelty, what’s the small suffering of being bullied, receiving criticism, being pressured to conform? I acknowledge the pettiness of such pain, but don’t manage to rejoice. Though I try to write honestly when prophetic words come, I don’t relish a prophet’s fate. Yet blessings have come to me through grief and struggle, humiliation and failure, and my all too human vulnerability. Like Job hearing God in the whirlwind, I have received the blessing of God’s bracing presence. Barbara Messner 24/01/2023
Out of the Blue
1. Lord, yes, I know the call goes on past these arrivals and beyond all that I know of who I am: I shall keep striving to respond. Here I am claimed, wrestled and named. Dark turns to light; grant me the sight. 2. Nothing as simple as one “yes” answers the urging that I hear. Nevertheless I celebrate all the assents despite the fear. How I am wooed, tracked and pursued. Losing I find me in your mind. 3. Here I have come to be your priest: here is my future for your own. Holding your life within my hands, let me embrace the grace I’m shown. Here I am heard, speaking your word, lifted above self in your love. Barbara Messner 2000
The Question of Call
The Question of Call Epiphany 3; Matthew 4:12-25 This inner urge, this outer nudge called “call” is hard to quantify or demonstrate, and having once said “yes”, that’s far from all. At times I do resist or remonstrate, pressed out and cut like pasta on a board, or wound around with tangled skeins of thread supposed to mark the way to this heart’s hoard within the labyrinth of paths my feet might tread. “Just call, I’ll follow,” I naively said, but he sets out on ways obscure and dark, and sometimes I am blundering with dread, not trusting in his words to find their mark. It’s hard to leave your nets upon the shore, let go of all the goals you had before. Barbara Messner written? altered 26/11/2022
Poet’s Dilemma
Poet’s Dilemma I try to draw the searching word in sight to speak a truth I hardly know is there, or name a feeling that disturbs my night, or bring a smothered fear into the air. Sometimes I wake as words begin to cling – it’s best to get a pen and let them out, or they may circle ‘til I let them sing. If I ignore them, they may leave, or shout! I make a web of rhythm and of rhyme: sometimes the strands will capture what I need, or if I let the words, unbidden, climb to fall in random heaps, what might I read? Sometimes I wonder if too neat a verse is just a box to keep truth in control lest it affect my life. I am perverse resisting what I guess might heal my soul. Revealing truth in word’s a two-edged sword, and Jesus must have known that as God’s Word. There’s only so much truth we can afford. God’s word still speaks. Can my words make it heard? Barbara Messner 12/01/2023
What Are You Looking For?
What are you looking for? Epiphany 2; John 1:29-42 When Jesus saw me following, he said, “What are you looking for?” I walked on slowly, pondering, and tried to reach for meaning’s core. “You are a chord to which I sing, a resonance most rich and true. You give imagination wing, show colours fresh with morning dew. You seem to wake the best of me, the gifts I had not learnt to trust, a wider, finer way to be, more caring, understanding, just. So teacher, let me stay a while wherever you have found to rest. He answered me with warmth and smile, “Yes, come and see and be my guest.” Barbara Messner 26/11/2022
Barb, poet priest 